A completely unofficial guide to surviving motherhood, because apparently nobody thought to include one.
There should really be a manual.
Not a 300-page parenting book.
A real manual.
The kind that comes with a new appliance.
Something that says:
WARNING: Sleep may be interrupted without notice.
IMPORTANT: Coffee may become cold before consumption.
TROUBLESHOOTING: If child says “Mom?” approximately 37 times in a row, remain calm.
Unfortunately, nobody handed us one.
So KindNest decided to start writing it.
Chapter 1: Sleep Is Apparently Optional
Congratulations!
You have become a mom.
You may now sleep whenever everyone else is asleep.
Just kidding.
Someone will need water.
Someone will have a bad dream.
Someone will suddenly remember an assignment due tomorrow.
Someone will need you to find the stuffed animal that has apparently vanished from the face of the earth.
And just when everyone is finally asleep...
You will hear:
“Mooooom?”
Chapter 2: Coffee Will Never Be Hot
You may make coffee.
You may even make it before everyone wakes up.
But please understand:
Drinking the coffee while it is actually hot is considered an advanced-level parenting skill.
Most moms will reheat the same cup approximately three times.
Some will eventually find it in the microwave the next morning.
Others will simply accept that room-temperature coffee is now part of their personality.
Chapter 3: You Will Know Where Everything Is
Your children will ask:
“Mom, where are my shoes?”
“Mom, where's my hoodie?”
“Mom, where's my charger?”
“Mom, have you seen my other shoe?”
You will somehow know.
You may have absolutely no idea where your phone is.
But you will know exactly where their stuff is.
This feature cannot be disabled.
Chapter 4: Everyone Will Need Something at the Same Time
This is an important one.
If you are:
on the phone
in the bathroom
cooking dinner
trying to sit down
finally eating your own food
answering an email
attempting to have five minutes of peace
someone will need you.
This is not a glitch.
This is apparently a built-in feature.
Chapter 5: Grocery Shopping Is Now a Financial Strategy
You will walk into the grocery store thinking:
“We just need a few things.”
Thirty-seven dollars later...
You still forgot the milk.
You will also discover that the children have somehow eaten everything you bought approximately four days ago.
And somehow there are still six bottles of ketchup in the refrigerator.
Nobody knows why.
Chapter 6: You Will Become a Professional Scheduler
School.
Work.
Appointments.
Sports.
Practices.
Birthdays.
Dentist appointments.
Grocery orders.
Car maintenance.
Homework.
Permission slips.
Birthdays you forgot were happening until Facebook reminded you.
And somewhere in there, you're supposed to remember to drink water.
Good luck.
Chapter 7: There Will Be Days When Dinner Is Cereal
And you know what?
That's okay.
Sometimes dinner is homemade.
Sometimes dinner is leftovers.
Sometimes it's sandwiches.
Sometimes everyone makes their own plate.
Sometimes it's frozen pizza.
And sometimes...
it's cereal.
The children survived.
You survived.
Nobody needs to call the parenting police.
Chapter 8: You Will Be Expected to Know Everything
You will somehow become:
Part nurse.
Part teacher.
Part chef.
Part chauffeur.
Part counselor.
Part referee.
Part detective.
Part event coordinator.
Part personal shopper.
Part snack distributor.
And occasionally...
part human Google.
“Mom, why is the moon following us?”
Good question.
Let's look it up.
Chapter 9: There Will Be Things Nobody Warned You About
Nobody warned you that sometimes you would miss the person you were before you became a mom.
Nobody warned you that you could be completely exhausted and still feel incredibly grateful.
Nobody warned you that worrying about money could take up so much mental space.
Nobody warned you how hard it can be to ask for help.
Nobody warned you that sometimes you would just need someone to say:
“I've got you.”
And maybe that's the chapter we should have included from the beginning.
Because motherhood was never supposed to mean doing everything alone.
Chapter 10: The Most Important Rule
There isn't one perfect way to be a mom.
There isn't one perfect way to raise a family.
There isn't one perfect dinner.
One perfect schedule.
One perfect house.
One perfect budget.
One perfect childhood.
And there certainly isn't one perfect mom.
There are just moms doing their best with what they have, what they know, and what today happens to throw at them.
And sometimes doing your best looks like asking for help.
Sometimes it looks like finding a resource.
Sometimes it looks like saying, “I don't know, but I'm going to figure it out.”
And sometimes it looks like putting everyone in pajamas at 6:30 and calling it a night.
If We Could Add One Chapter…
Okay, moms.
Your turn.
If motherhood came with an actual user manual, what would you put in it?
Finish this sentence:
“Chapter ___: Nobody warned me that __________.”
Or tell us:
What's the one piece of advice you wish someone had given you before you became a mom?
We might even turn some of your answers into a future KindNest blog.
Because let's be honest...
Moms have been writing the real manual all along.
From KindNest
At KindNest, we know family life doesn't always go according to plan.
Sometimes families need diapers.
Sometimes they need baby or children's essentials.
Sometimes they need help finding a resource, organization, program, or place to turn.
And sometimes they simply need someone to listen.
If your family is experiencing hardship and you're looking for available assistance from KindNest, you can start here:
Request Support:
https://www.kindnestproject.org/application
You can also explore the KindNest website for resources, information, and ways to connect with our community:
https://www.kindnestproject.org/
Because maybe the most important thing that should have been included in the motherhood manual is this: